By Edwin Heath
There was a young man
From the parish of Holm,
Who, when in a jam,
Would never eat Spam.
He loved his CB.
Though on sitting for tea –
Heard his wife say, “Oh damn,
W’iv run oot o’ ham …
Would you settle for lamb?”
Och, nivver!”, said he.
“Jest fetch me a dram
While I saddle me ram,
Then call Mrs Yam
On the auld CB.
Ah’m nae wantin’ no lamb,
Nor nivver no Spam …
But a Holm ‘ham’’s ham
Wid dae nicely for me!”
