By Bernie Bell

Sunday, the 21^st of November, and I had an appointment for my Covid Booster jab.

Last night, I had a dream.

In the dream I arrived at the hospital, walked up to the desk where they tick your name off the list, and the young woman there said that my appointment had been yesterday, Saturday, so I couldn’t have my Booster.

I argued that I’d had a letter and, though I know that I get confused about things sometimes, I’d written the appointment on the calendar and pinned the letter to the noticeboard in the kitchen – that I was definitely due to get my jab on the 21^st – and asked could they not fit me in?  She was adamant that I could not have my Booster unless I could prove that she was mistaken.

So, we went home and I got the letter.  When we got back to the hospital all the vaccination paraphernalia had been cleared away.  There was an empty desk with a young woman sitting doing her nails in a very unconcerned sort of way.  I explained the situation, and she said it was nothing to do with her.  Then I woke up.

Dreams – show so much of what’s going on in our heads.

I’m aware that even all three jabs don’t mean that a person doesn’t get Covid – it should mean that they don’t get it as badly and that they don’t die.  For some, getting it at all would be risky – and I’m one of them.  I believe that the jabs are all worth having, and are A GOOD THING, but I also believe that the main way to avoid catching Covid is to avoid situations in which it can catch you – situations which give it a chance to get into your system. When it comes down to it, this means avoiding close contact with other people – especially indoors.  

I think that the root of what happened in my dream is that I feel that, however much I try to behave as I should, the actions of other people will dictate my life for some time yet – even more than usual!

I won’t feel comfortable or safe being among people until there is a general acceptance and understanding that our individual actions affect us all.

And that’s the maggot I’ve got in my brain – how other people – from those in charge, making the rules, making the lists to be ticked off – through to …..everyone around us – can and will influence our lives, and my life, until we all work together.

Strength in Unity.

And now I’m home, and it all went well – no-one being obstructive – everyone being very helpful – all done for the good of all.

That’s how it can be, and that’s what can help me to overcome the maggot of fear that I have in my brain.

I’ve noticed that I’m getting so that I don’t want to be with people, which is entirely un-natural for me. 

I’m not so much looking to get back to ‘normal’ as to get back to a more natural way for myself, and for humanity, to be with each other and in the world.

Hope-fully, one day, before I’m too old and worn-out to appreciate it – that will happen. But even if I’m worn-out or gone, it will be there, for the young. Hopefully.